This post was a comment on Society of Phineas, (and reposted at Dalrock, in the thread that spawned SoP’s post.) but I wanted to repost here for posterity; that anyone can find. I have edited it a good deal, to become a more complete post.
In no way do I absolve the women of the reality and guilt of abusing men; particularly husbands. To wit: If she cheats, or is a slut, that is her fault. Nevertheless, as I won’t be married to a cheater, and God allows it to happen, then I must accept that it is God’s will that I not be married–provided He does not change my heart.
A woman does NOT have the same moral culpability that a man does. That is not to say they have none at all. Scripture is clear that women as a sex were given a mediator because of this weakness; first the father and then the husband. Numbers 30.
3 “If a woman vows a vow to the Lord and binds herself by a pledge, while within her father’s house in her youth, 4 and her father hears of her vow and of her pledge by which she has bound herself and says nothing to her, then all her vows shall stand, and every pledge by which she has bound herself shall stand. 5 But if her father opposes her on the day that he hears of it, no vow of hers, no pledge by which she has bound herself shall stand. And the Lord will forgive her, because her father opposed her.
6 “If she marries a husband, while under her vows or any thoughtless utterance of her lips by which she has bound herself, 7 and her husband hears of it and says nothing to her on the day that he hears, then her vows shall stand, and her pledges by which she has bound herself shall stand. 8 But if, on the day that her husband comes to hear of it, he opposes her, then he makes void her vow that was on her, and the thoughtless utterance of her lips by which she bound herself. And the Lord will forgive her. 9 (But any vow of a widow or of a divorced woman, anything by which she has bound herself, shall stand against her.) 10 And if she vowed in her husband’s house or bound herself by a pledge with an oath, 11 and her husband heard of it and said nothing to her and did not oppose her, then all her vows shall stand, and every pledge by which she bound herself shall stand. 12 But if her husband makes them null and void on the day that he hears them, then whatever proceeds out of her lips concerning her vows or concerning her pledge of herself shall not stand. Her husband has made them void, and the Lord will forgive her. 13 Any vow and any binding oath to afflict herself, her husband may establish,or her husband may make void. 14 But if her husband says nothing to her from day to day, then he establishes all her vows or all her pledges that are upon her. He has established them, because he said nothing to her on the day that he heard of them. 15 But if he makes them null and void after he has heard of them, then he shall bear her iniquity.”
Should a woman reject her prescribed mediator, she is on her own. She has this ability; which nearly all modern women practice.
Scripture is also clear that women as a race–mankind–need a Mediator because of mankind’s moral depravity. Christ does not go His own way, in regards to us women (men and women) that repent. Having heard of our sins, He pleads our moral vacuity (we know not what we do) before the Father, and so absolves us of them. We become blameless not because we do not sin, but by recognizing we are guilty and weak, and so subject ourselves to His blameless rule. He pleads our case of: not guilty by reason of insanity…lack of reason; lack of Logos. We cast our sins upon the Sinless, at His offering. This is remarkably unfair to the Man–which only makes since in an inherently unfair world. It is not justice to the law, which is made for the world and condemns, but mercy–we are justified to His love.
Compounding the problem, in their cowardice, earthly fathers have created a moral hazard for wives and daughters by not informing them of their true choices: submit to their fathers until they marry and then to their husbands, or submit to themselves and prepare to suffer their own consequences.
So who is more to blame here? It is men. By our sin of abdication is the ground cursed, because we would not stand up against sin, for the sake of our women, and before the Lord. No change will come until fathers begin to incline their hearts to their women in true love and understanding of their nature.
We do not need a men’s rights movement (does the Bible ever speak of rights?); we need a true men’s responsibility movement;
32 As for the cities of the Levites, the Levites may redeem at any time the houses in the cities they possess. 33 And if one of the Levites exercises his right of redemption, then the house that was sold in a city they possess shall be released in the jubilee. For the houses in the cities of the Levites are their possession among the people of Israel.
one that informs women of their options, and also casts out those that choose to go their own way, to be disciplined by Satan. This is the error of:
Christian husbands and fathers of the world (best demonstrated by Feminist Christian leadership, to sell our wives and daughters as equal sisters rather than subordinates, that we might prosper.)
the MRA movement (best demonstrated by their desire to change caesar’s laws and science to accomplish God’s order, instead of rendering what has the face of God back to Him),
and Players (best demonstrated by their eagerness to suffer, and cause suffering, not for the sake of love, but for the sake of pleasure, revenge and destruction).
It is sacrificial and fearful to be the man, but if we will assume our authority, and intervene in love, our helpmeets can begin healing immediately; without one law of man being being changed. Though, the time of reclamation will have to wait for the jubilee.
I will repeat what I said before: celibacy is a righteous option. However; insofar as anyone rejects that women’s independence, harlotry, and idolatry (in a word: Feminism) is a problem to first be sorted out by fathers and husbands–by explaining and maintaining the scriptural order–they are in error because we are men under authority.
5 When he had entered Capernaum, a centurion came forward to him, appealing to him,6 “Lord, my servant is lying paralyzed at home, suffering terribly.” 7 And he said to him, “I will come and heal him.” 8 But the centurion replied, “Lord, I am not worthy to have you come under my roof, but only say the word, and my servant will be healed. 9 For I too am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. And I say to one, ‘Go,’ and he goes, and to another, ‘Come,’ and he comes, and to my servant, ‘Do this,’ and he does it.” 10 When Jesus heard this, he marveled and said to those who followed him, “Truly, I tell you, with no one in Israel have I found such faith. 11 I tell you, many will come from east and west and recline at table with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven, 12 while the sons of the kingdom will be thrown into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.”13 And to the centurion Jesus said, “Go; let it be done for you as you have believed.” And the servant was healed at that very moment.
Finally, I want to add that I do not say these things because I have tried them, and they’ve worked so well for me, but because I believe they are true even though my trying of them is very shabby. This blog is as much a working-through for myself as it is a proclamation to the world. The Jubilee is coming.
I also want to remind my readers that I write with an eye towards the Christian man who desires marriage; with a special emphasis on not letting the wisdom of the world crowd out the wisdom of God–most especially as it pertains to finding a wife, the role of the husband, and sexual sin.