Matt Walsh Gets Bored and Blows Up Families

I took a trip over to Matt Walsh’s blog today. His most recent post is about the scourge of male adultery in the form of pornography. Actually, that’s not quite right. It’s a condemnation of married men as adulterers if they’ve ever used porn. What follows here is my comment there.

The most likely explanation for the author’s post is that the author struggles with porn use, and his heavy-handed attack here is an attempt to convince himself take his desire for porn more seriously; that–deep down–he isn’t one of Those Guys. And, it is heavy-handed to throw the word adultery out there when women are chomping at the bit to rule over their husbands–as the Bible says they are. Once they’ve got the adultery bit in their mouths grace and forgiveness are thrown completely off.

It’s very true that in many households the husband is illicitly storing highly explosive porn. He keeps it tucked away; that’s why we have to “catch” them using porn, like A Girl reported above[1]. He knows its wrong. He probably hates himself after he uses it. A single match like that can really scar a man.

Forget Fifty Shades of Grey. There are gallons of incendiary Downton Abbey, sticks of Cosmo, molotovs of Teen Mom; gases of Maroon 5, and bricks of The Housewives of Wherever…and they’re thrown causally around the house. Really, it’s stacked to the ceiling.

Here’s come Matt Walsh to throw the bomb of adultery into the house. When it goes up like Hiroshima, what will he say? “Well, that guy shouldn’t have had a drawer-ful of TNT. Serves him right!” Where is the word against the pro-snark, pro-loud, ungentle, envy-raising, emotional porn (Not just “trash”, but trash meant explicitly to titillate the sexual senses. I’m looking at you, Crawley dynasty) that FILLED the house that Matt threw the bomb of adultery into?

Not a peep, Matt?

[1]In the comments, someone calling themselves “A Girl” wrote about walking in on her father viewing porn. I left the following remark addressed to her:

You need to read your Bible before you get on the Internet and retell stories about your father.

<i>Genesis9: 20 And Noah began to be an husbandman, and he planted a vineyard: 21 and he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent. 22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without. 23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father’s nakedness. 24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him. 25 And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren. 26 And he said, Blessed be the Lord God of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant. 27 God shall enlarge Japheth, and he shall dwell in the tents of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.</i>

And it was so.

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27 thoughts on “Matt Walsh Gets Bored and Blows Up Families

  1. I posted a comment on the first page within the first few minutes the post was up.
    My comment garnered over 40 replies.
    Now I’m in moderation from a frenzy of hamsters.

  2. After reading through some of the comments after your comment, ar, I’m shocked that not a single person could even throw you a bone and admit that wives deny sex very often. Lots of strawmen. Porn sucks, but that wasn’t really a rational or all-encompassing conversation. Lots of hysteria, also. I don’t think porn is a rational or well-thought out solution to denial, but I know for sure that denial is the main reason most men would give for porn use; I haven’t talked to many men about it, but lots of women have told me how much they dread having to have sex. Very sad. If you’re going to discuss porn, you need to discuss denial, also.

  3. I too am a bit of a fan of Downton Abbey and Cane and I have had some disagreements on this. However, the eldest sister is definitely a problem and the middle sister, who (I’m only in season two so they may have destroyed that too) is by far the best of the set is played down as an annoying brat.

    That being said I think it goes a long way in the right direction and I invoke Cane’s own posts on conservatives destroying Conservatives on this one.

  4. @AR

    You held your own pretty good, and resisted the many attempts to shift the frame. I’m glad you pointed out your comments, because by the time I read the post there weree already 400-plus comments. No way I was going to read all those, “Matt, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH for saying this. I love my husband, but I wish he was more like you!”

    @Joanna

    After reading through some of the comments after your comment, ar, I’m shocked that not a single person could even throw you a bone and admit that wives deny sex very often.

    That’s so often the case, but it’s not a good argument to make; especially in this case.

    1) Matt has abused that bit of the sermon on the mount to beat up on the victims of pornography. It’s the old “Men killed; women and children hit hardest” canard. Women are by far the makers and consumers of porn. Jesus was actually talking to those who thought and acted as though they were righteous because they did not do what “those other bad people do. He closed his post: “Real men don’t look at pornography.” How thick-headed can he be? Jesus was talking about people who were acting like Matt Walsh did in that post. If they’re not real men, then it would be unjust of God to punish them as real men.

    2) Again: Women are by far the makers and consumers of porn, and Walsh writes one more article about how men watching it is what is ruining our society? So much for the Good Samaritan. Let’s just ignore the robbers, cheer on the passer-by priests, and give a swfit kick to the urchin cluttering up the road. Boys, we did it!

    3) Jesus didn’t finish his ministry at the Sermon on the Mount. He continues on for another three years and says a lot about how we all need to repent, but Matt framed his post in a way that ignores that, and he did it on purpose. It has the effect of turning the light that brightens the whole house, into a spotlight of shame on the weak. Jesus was saying the exact opposite.

    @Velvet

    Downton Abbey is a straight-up soap opera with better costumes. “Call the Midwife”, while also serial in nature (jumping back and forth between scenes over a long series of shows) has much more substance. For the record, I personally abstain from both on the complex-but-solid argument that I have testicles, but only Downton Abbey is banned in my house.

  5. @GKC

    That being said I think it goes a long way in the right direction and I invoke Cane’s own posts on conservatives destroying Conservatives on this one.

    I watched all of season one, and I saw nothing pro-conservative about that show. Whatever is portrayed as conservative is either backwards, trite, or “just how things are done”; never is it correct.

    My impression was–and I believe this is what they meant it to be–that although some of that era was beautiful (Hey, and isn’t it fabulous to have rich problems!) and even understandable in their backwards society, aren’t we all really just better-off now? As evidence of this conspiracy, I put forward that the major dilemma of season one–Mary’s fornication and it’s, ah, resolution–was picked precisely because the one thing they knew all women can agree on is that banging a foreign prince and getting away with it is just too hot to ignore.

    Addendum: I meant to say this earlier, but it would be fair to hoist me on my petard for this post in general; as Matt Walsh is some form of conservative-minded person. No one called me on that, and I’d like to say that I’m surprised, but I’m not because I’m read by conservative-minded people; like myself. This is what we do.

    In this particular instance it was deliberate, for two reasons. First, to see if anyone would say anything. Second, because it was a reflection of Walsh’s post title.

  6. I am constantly irked on the disregard of the other verses in the context as well. I get so sick of pompous and contemptuous women trolling on about how when their husband looks at porn its the same as adultery. Good grief dont they realize that if they have ever insulted him than according to the context, they are guilty of murder?

    I am NOT sanctioning porn any more than murder, but you would think that they would have to common sense to wonder if indeed there is more to the verse than what is on its face.

  7. I’ll admit to not knowing Walsh so I didn’t read the post. I didn’t feel I had scope to judge. I also studiously said nothing bad about him.

    And yes, Mary is flat out vile. However:
    1.) The mother is not and reacts to the disaster of the lover with concern over what will happen to her husband.
    2.) Mary does confess to her father…if I remember right…
    3.) The second daughter is a paragon of virtue and “courts” her target the right way. In fact my biggest beef isn’t Mary, but that she’s played to be “weak” for doing this.
    4.) The Grandmother is…well…she reminds me of both of mine in certain ways. The hen pecking senior hen is a role all women should aspire to. She’s on the whole a good character minus her “story told” line in reference to Mary.
    5.) Mary’s romantic opponent is pure angel. The writing staff of course corrupts that by making her a de facto accomplice in Mary’s second conquest.

    On the whole its oodles better than almost anything else available. I’m Christian as are you, so the pure fact is we’ve been antagonistic towards entertainment for near on two thousand years. None of it is really good enough. DA at least hits some of the right notes.

  8. Keoni Galt just noted on my site that Jenny Erikson tweeted her enthusiastic approval of Matt’s throw-all-husbands-under-the-bus* post. Here is the link: https://twitter.com/JennyErikson/status/405018514001362944 :

    Married men: your porn habit is an adultery habit http://themattwalshblog.com/2013/11/25/married-men-your-porn-habit-is-an-adultery-habit/ … (I love this guy)

    I say all husbands, because the Scripture he cites as proving that viewing pornography is adultery points out that all men fail in this regard. So, according to this logic, there is no such thing as frivolous divorce since all men (and therefore all husbands) are adulterers. I can see why Ms. Erikson and so many other women are so delighted with Matt. However, I’m fairly certain that the innocent children who take their respective trips through the broken home meat grinder will be less than delighted with the results.

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  10. I think this trope needs to be laid to rest as well…Matt wrote:

    “Christ laid it out very clearly: if you lust after another woman, you have committed adultery. ”

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but I do believe the point Jesus was making here is that sin starts in the heart (mind). Once you seriously contemplate (fantasize) committing adultery, your far more likely to indulge in it should the opportunity arise.

    I don’t believe Jesus was saying Visual and Mental Lust is the sinful equivalent of actual fornication and adultery, but rather it was a warning to guard your thoughts from such temptation in the first place.

  11. Ah yes, “Lust”. This is an important topic, and I think that, unfortunately, there is a lot of bad teaching on this subject, and that over time we’ve built up rules around it, much as the Pharisees did.

    As a note, the following is my own contemplation. I am not claiming any inspiration or conviction to speak from the Holy Spirit on the topic.

    After all, while the bible says, in 1 Corinthians 6:18 “Flee from sexual immorality.”, Jesus himself said in Mathew 11:28-39 “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

    It’s important while we seek to avoid sexual immorality, which we not create burdens that are heavier than intended for our brethren, and thus cause them to stumble or stray from the path.

    The word lust took on its narrower sexual meaning from a much broader word, which can easily be used as a synonym for “covet”. If we covet our neighbor’s lawn mower, we have already broken one of the commandments, and sinned. So to, if we covet our neighbor’s wife.

    But we do not sin if we look at the lawnmower, or complement our friend on his lawnmower, or even if we contemplate gaining one like it. It’s only when we desire the lawnmower so much that we would steal it from him if given the chance that we sin. In that case, if a man were to steal his neighbor’s lawnmower, the actual theft is just an outer expression of the sin we have already committed in our hearts.

    The same holds if that item is a gun, even if holding and shooting the weapon while his friend shows it off arouse in him fantasies of hunting with it, or target shooting, and he enjoys the heft of it, and the adrenal rush it causes.

    By the same token, if a man looks at an image, but harbors no intent to actually sleep with the woman in that image, even if he were presented with the chance, I don’t think he’s actually sinned.

    However, I do think that porn can present an opening for that sin. If a man looks at pictures of a particular model over and over again, at some point he’s likely to cross the line, and be willing to sleep with her if she ever presents herself to him.

  12. In some churches, a connection is made between Jesus’ divorce exception in Matthew 19:9 and pornography. Matthew 19:9 states “And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” (ESV) The Greek word translated here as “sexual immorality” is porneia. Pornography has a similar word as its root – “porne” + graphein.

    I have actually had a discussion on this interpretation in my mens’ group, with an elder equating pornography with porneia and hence a justifiable reason for divorce. Although sinful, I disagreed with this interpretation. But, some wives need not even use the “lust” teaching from Jesus as equivalent to adultery as fodder for divorce.

  13. @KG & Etienne

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but I do believe the point Jesus was making here is that sin starts in the heart (mind).

    I have actually had a discussion on this interpretation in my mens’ group, with an elder equating pornography with porneia and hence a justifiable reason for divorce.

    I think the only way to interpret Christ’s words is that lusting is adultery, and that the sin that never leaves the heart still stains the person. The point being: Everyone is an adulterer, and who is not an adulterer is a thief, and who is not an adulterer and a thief is a murderer. Matt, an adulterer, ought to treat other men as fellow beggars of Christ’s forgiveness, and tell them where they can find bread.

    There’s a lot more to think about concerning lust, porn, adultery–not least of which is men and women’s different responses to them as offenders and observers of offenders–but the main thing I wanted for this post was to reflect that

    1) These screeds are the acts of pharisees, as Josh the Aspie said.

    2) They give massive cover for women to only only continue but elevate(!) their own sin as godliness. There’s no biblical prescription for wives to divorce their husbands; ever. It’s sometimes understandable, and we individually might give some cases a pass, but there is zero allowance for it in Scripture. Even the allowance given to husbands in cases of manifest adultery is called out by Jesus as not in keeping with the spirit of God; Who forgives all.

  14. @KG & Etienne & Cane Caldo

    Cane Caldo, you said mostly what I had to say already. I was also going to mention James 2:10 “For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.”

    So anyone who wants to black night on a discussion like this could say, you don’t have a shoplifting problem, you have an adultery problem, as breaking one point of the law is the same as breaking all of it.

    The point of these verses is not in regards to how men relate to other men. It applies to how men relate to God. So while it is good to know about God’s standards of perfection, it is not a prescription to treat people who have lusted as if they committed adultery, people who have hated as though they committed murder, or people who have shoplifted as though they had committed every sin imaginable.

    To be consistent, anyone who believes that porn is cause for divorce, should also believe that saying “You fool” to someone should be a crime that is tried in court, and if the accused is found guilty, treated the same as if they had murdered.

  15. Another “Christian” has sold his soul to the devil… Who is this Matt Walsh? I’m in travel and will not bother to have any team research his funding that led to his work of the beast. Any “Christian” that has sold his soul to the devil will be exposed. When you speak of these popular TV shows, you don’t have people posing as “Christians” taking credit for creating it.

    Let me predict what the industry will force the Matt Walsh to do. He will apologize for his deal with the devil and he will become the entity that spends his years proving that Mommy Porn (term coined by women, not by men) is the most popular genre on Amazon primarily because of women that say they believe in the “God of the Bible”

    What a fool to accept a deal in exchange for his soul over a topic that will expose him so quickly. At least Kirk Cameron got a few embarrassingly poorly produced marriage destroying movies out of the deal. Matt Walsh has earned the reversal of benefits of his deal with the devil. Sorry Matt, your part of the deal is permanent. They don’t let folks negotiate the way out.

    The industry will influence women will find him repulsive. They’ll likely make him call “Mommy Porn” porn for “Christian women” … More on that later. Oh for sure the Matt Walsh soul feels good having this sudden fame, but when you’re messing on this level, he’s in over his head. Hollywood has no reward for what he’s doing. Yes I know what I’m talking about. Cane: Email me.

  16. @Keoni_Galt

    Hmm, do I detect yet another example of female projection?

    “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I do believe the point Jesus was making here is that sin starts in the heart (mind). Once you seriously contemplate (fantasize) committing adultery, your far more likely to indulge in it should the opportunity arise.”

    As (I’m sure) everybody here knows, men are visual & tactile; porn – usually – isn’t about imagining that we’re the pizza delivery man. It’s about finding the visual and audio stimulations to achieve arousal. Watching porn might be neglecting your wife, and denying her sex – but seldom is the man thinking about cheating. He just needs to orgasm.

    Women, however (I suspect), are prone to watching these romances and imagining themselves in the damsel’s role. I can’t remember where I saw it (Kids in the Hall? Monty Python?) but there was a great scene of two old biddies watching a soap opera, judging the women for being slutty… while secretly getting aroused. They assured each other “No, we’re not like that,” but really – they both wished they *were* that girl.

    I certainly don’t want to say this about all women, but it certainly seems that A LOT of them are utterly unable to empathize with their husbands.

  17. @David J Aurini

    “I certainly don’t want to say this about all women”

    Its currently impossible to gather data about all women for one study. So we cannot assume that in the 1st place.

  18. @Davis M.J. Aurini

    Generally speaking, women do not experience empathy in the same way that men do. Women primarily experience empathy for their own infants, children, family, and friends, in order of decreasing strength.

    A woman’s empathy for a lover or mate is primarily tied to how valuable she sees that lover as being.

    This is not to imply that women are inferior to men, and yes, some women have masculinised parts of their brains and experience male-pattern empathy. Most women don’t.

    Women act this way because it’s critical that a mother prioritise the needs of her infant above that of pretty much any other human on earth. Our survival as a species has depended on it.

  19. As another commenter pointed out, in order to take on the porn problem (and it can be a debilitating addiction) you also have to take on the “denial” problem. I.e., where the husband is denied sex by the wife, often for an extended period of time (hand raised).

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