Security Conference Seduction

Last Thursday the sun shone, the air was warm, and the apartment complex pool next to the sand volleyball court was clean. Swarmed in this space were a hundred or more men and women; college students with the day off. Nearly all the men had taken off their shirts. Most of the women wore bikinis. Each had a can or bottle of something, and they all laughed and touched and mooned. Trap boomed and screeched from overdriven speakers. To the untrained eye, it was something like a bacchanalian scene. But I–having been raised in church–knew that I witnessed the dark ritual seduction of innocent females seeking security.

The men faked good humor while the music hypnotized the women with its subtle lyrics of fornication and riches. They only did so because it was expected of them by the prospective papas at this impromptu security conference. The bumping propaganda lulled the women, and by this clever hypnosis and other unseen trickery the young men coerced the women to rub their bodies upon their oppressors. They only hung on the predators–as if each were a jungle gym–to see which man was strong enough to give a paternal hug, or some day hand his little girl an ice cream cone.

And so what about the beverages? What recourse had the poor, nearly naked, dears from this nightmare but to drink? How else to quell their fears of remaining unloved for who they were on the inside, or to drown their sorrows for having to pick from such a poor selection of future fathers who could not even manage a shirt?

Those women didn’t mean to wear bikinis around a bunch of sex-minded men instead of their dads. It was just bad luck.

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5 thoughts on “Security Conference Seduction

  1. I’ve witnessed scenes just like this many times. The poor young women were so desperate for security that they followed the only logical path. They knew that men who provide security are going to be looking for women who need it. Therefore the security seekers wear as little as possible to demonstrate that unlike the men offering security, they have tiny muscles. The men seem to take a trust but verify approach to this however, as I suspect they’ve been burned by women pretending to have small muscles before. They carefully inspect the women’s bodies, and follow up with close physical contact. There is no way a muscular woman will sneak in on their watch!

  2. Feminists see such scenes and deduce this is basically date-rape. We understand this in the sense that we know Feminists are full of crap. Wilson sees a bunch of women get date-raped too, but sympathizes that the women meant to hook up with their fathers. This strikes him as only natural.

  3. I had to squint for almost a full minute before clicking the link to Dalrock’s and understanding this. Good one.

  4. These women do desire security. Just don’t you dare say it needs to be from their dad or another chaperone.

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