Because He Said So

Despite devilish and divisive opinions to the contrary, there exist persons explicitly ordained and commanded to say what is–and what is not–modest. They are called fathers and husbands. The reason I said “To get out of this trap is going to take generations. I suspect that my daughters may be among the first Yiayias in a long time” is because Yiayia’s don’t occur out of nowhere. Nor do their standards of modesty arise from the ether. They are the product of long and loving toil from their fathers and husbands.

A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches,
    and favor is better than silver or gold.
The rich and the poor meet together;
    the Lord is the maker of them all.
The prudent sees danger and hides himself,
    but the simple go on and suffer for it.
The reward for humility and fear of the Lord
    is riches and honor and life.
Thorns and snares are in the way of the crooked;
    whoever guards his soul will keep far from them.
Train up a child in the way he should go;
    even when he is old he will not depart from it.

and

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body.

The generations before us–since at least and including “The Greatest Generation”–have not only dropped the ball, but tossed it out of the park and declared the whole activity of raising children to be a null and boring and even oppressive pastime. The field itself was let to go wild; so now men like Empath, Dalrock, Oscar–and yes myself–are flat lost in a thorny, rocky, arid wilderness that many pretend is still a fit ballpark. It’s a lie.

What seems so mysterious and subjective to women is not to men. That is because while women are well-positioned to police these matters, they are not the arbiters of them. Husbands and fathers are. What makes Yiayias unseemly to modern people–why they work to make them irrelevant, and corral them into oblivion–is that those women bear the beauty of truth from a lifetime of listening to their husbands and fathers; who they did not rebel against and who they did not divorce as our post-modern women do.

Of those husbands and fathers, not one of them was perfect. It didn’t matter because for the person in the position of submission: Obedience unto a husband and father and unto God will itself prove fruitful. Likewise, imperfection in training a child or washing a wife with the Word does not nullify God’s promise. Steadfast faithfulness with what we have been entrusted will bring forth a harvest.

So, modesty is defined and judged by the fathers and husbands, and policed by older women

But as for you (Titus, the pastor of the church in Crete, a man) , teach what accords with sound doctrine. Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness. Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

Likewise, despite raging controversies over whether Christians ought to date, hook-up, engage in formalized courtship, whathaveyou–the main and Biblical thing is to do is: What your own father and husband approves.  Dating, courtship, “the college experience”…these are all systems that may have been put forth as helpful guidelines, but the moment the father becomes subject to them rather than the systems subject to the fathers, then they become corrals to pen in the shepherds. This cannot be allowed to continue.

Patriarchy scares women. More importantly it incites them to harridan heights under the excuse of fear. But like a man must gird his loins even when fear turns his bowels to water, women are going to have to reach deep down insides themselves and kill that rebellious spirit.

If the Christian’s Men’s Sphere proves anything, it’s that fathers and husbands will have discussions among themselves. They will set the community standards; fluidly and organically, but like concerned family farmers with a vested interest and not as eco-crazed nihilists or money-crazed corpo-rape-tions.  These things can remain subjective and mysterious to women (as their nature adores), but to us they will be toiled over and decided in love. At the same time, we depend most heavily on the support of women to uphold us as we undertake these tasks. It is not good for us to be alone. The blessings of Yiayias are hard to overstate. Just ask those of us fathers and husbands who lack them.

Advertisements

22 thoughts on “Because He Said So

  1. Radical feminism is mainly about trying to seduce women to see men – fathers and husbands – as abusers and controllers, not protectors. Women need to feel safe. They are more vulnerable. Yet there aren’t real protectors elsewhere.

  2. “If the Christian’s Men’s Sphere proves anything, it’s that fathers and husbands will have discussions among themselves. They will set the community standards; fluidly and organically, but like concerned family farmers with a vested interest and not as eco-crazed nihilists or money-crazed corpo-rape-tions.”

    And I see you beat me to the comments on organic low level growth.

  3. Or, as I often point out when I say they aren’t “persons”, Corpse-orations are undead entities animated by the FrankenState, and are endowed by their creator with whatever rights their creator can give it. Maybe the Shelly Corpseorations will destroy Dr. FrankenState.

    Responsible Fathers and Mothers will find proper Fathers and Mothers for their grandchildren. It isn’t just the daughters, but they are the hands that rock the cradle. The offspring might consider someone to propose, but the parents will often have to act to dispose.

  4. I also have to point out “Because He Said So” isn’t a slap as such but requires explanation. I remember a post where someone went for a medical test and was asked to fill out a form with all kinds of intrusive and personal data. They did because “The Nurse Said So”. Do we automatically obey authority figures? Police (I’m polite but critical when not threatened with a citation, see copblock.org, policemisconduct.net). Doctors (vactruth.com).

    A father or husband will make mistakes, but he is charged with the responsibility. Sometimes Doctors make mistakes too – but it is not always malpractice (negligence or intentional infliction of harm). The authority of men is that which has has now devolved (note the word) to “government”, “experts” and others who aren’t held to account.

    “You haven’t gotten a shot because Daddy spent several hours and found out that the particular shot which is available http://www.merck.com/product/usa/pi_circulars/m/mmr_ii/mmr_ii_pi.pdf might hurt you and we aren’t going to Disneyland in Anaheim in the next few weeks anyway”. Actually Mommy, as the help-meet is often the one that does this, but can end up being overprotective, as JHW complains but is rebutted http://vactruth.com/2015/02/20/jennifer-hibben-white/ – that’s why a child needs both parents. In Hebrew there is no singular form of “parents”.

    I can only wonder if C.S. Lewis would have been a Catholic, would there be a “untame Lioness” modeled after Mary. Men do not want “the old gray mare”, they want the spirited, fast, strong, powerful horse, but in submission. Men ought to image Aslan, the untamed Lion, but want the untamed but submissive-ONLY-to-the-mate Lioness.

  5. The whole post is spot on IMO. If only more of us would think at this level, or if we are, that we would speak out and act.

  6. Pingback: What’s cooking on the Homefront #13 (and practial modesty notes) | Loving in the Ruins

  7. Of those husbands and fathers, not one of them was perfect. It didn’t matter because for the person in the position of submission: Obedience unto a husband and father and unto God will itself prove fruitful. Likewise, imperfection in training a child or washing a wife with the Word does not nullify God’s promise. Steadfast faithfulness with what we have been entrusted will bring forth a harvest.

    Faith: the evidence of things not seen. We Christians love to quote 2 Corinthians 5:7, but in reality we walk by sight (and how we feel about what we see) than anything else. It’s why wives feel free to buck their husband’s authority when they have determined he is wrong.

    these are all systems that may have been put forth as helpful guidelines, but the moment the father becomes subject to them rather than the systems subject to the fathers, then they become corrals to pen in the shepherds. This cannot be allowed to continue.

    But we (me especially!) like formulas. They give us comfort. We get stuck in being justified by the rules and never grow up to being justified by faith. It’s the story of my walk really, a constant struggle. Which is why I suspect that I was blessed with a husband who actually walks by faith rather than running around quoting Scripture about how much he walks by faith.

    I’ve read this 3 times now. It’s rich and deep and full of opportunities to think. Even for a woman.

  8. Elspeth says:
    February 23, 2015 at 2:53 pm

    “But we (me especially!) like formulas.”

    I like formulas. Until I don’t. Then I rebel.

    That brings up a question, though. The Bible doesn’t give us a formula for modesty. Did God do that deliberately for our benefit? Did God leave it up to husbands and fathers to determine the boundaries so that we’d HAVE to wrestle with the question? Is the wrestling part of our training at our Heavenly Father’s hand? How do we know that we are Honoring Him with the boundaries we set?

  9. Pingback: “The Difference between Gold and Pigs”, or “Mennonites in the Mist” | Things that We have Heard and Known

  10. @Ata

    Welcome.

    I have not talked about suppression of female sexuality from a psychological perspective. Your invocation of it (psychology) here is like bringing to my attention that nine out of ten sorcerers do not agree with me.

    If I were to begin sifting, Coahuiltecan-style, through the research, I am confident that what I said (women are well-positioned to police other women) would be found among the remains.

  11. @Oscar: “The Bible doesn’t give us a formula for modesty” Through-out history in all the different cultures, prostitutes have developed different costumes which identify them. Some may have their body covered, but the costume says ” whore”. People, originally made in the image of God, are very creative, thus no formula from God on most anything. People easily learn to fake it.

  12. And I see you beat me to the comments on organic low level growth.

    The truth behind the expression “the slovenliness of our language makes it easier to have foolish thoughts.” is gone greater by day.

  13. Systems run men in general in the post-feminist-victory version of corporate life…..school programs….diet and fitness fads….safety programs….touchy feely post meeting questionnaires asking if you “felt heard”….thankfully I dont have to suffer that nonsense but most men in corporate jobs, say in >1bln$ companies, have that problem

  14. @Bobbye says:
    February 26, 2015 at 1:34 pm

    “People, originally made in the image of God, are very creative, thus no formula from God on most anything. People easily learn to fake it.”

    Yes. I read somewhere that is the flip side of legalism. I don’t remember where, though. C.S. Lewis, maybe?

  15. Pingback: The long road to restoration | chokingonredpills

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s